The Silent Battle: Understanding Beliefs, Resistance, and Growth

The greatest challenge in understanding oneself lies in realising that our beliefs are not as objective as we often assume. They are shaped by invisible forces—our upbringing, culture, social surroundings, and personal experiences—all weaving together to create a lens through which we view the world. These beliefs become so deeply ingrained that they feel like unquestionable truths, guiding our decisions, emotions, and even our sense of identity.  

From childhood, we absorb ideas without questioning them. The human brain, wired for survival and social belonging, clings to what it learns early in life. A child raised in a particular faith, for instance, may accept its teachings as absolute, not out of choice, but because it is the foundation of their world. A person growing up in a tight-knit community inherits its values, often without realising how much those surroundings have shaped them. As years pass, the brain reinforces these beliefs, filtering information in a way that confirms them. This is the power of confirmation bias—it makes us seek out what aligns with what we already "know" and ignore what challenges it.

But the real test comes when these beliefs are questioned. When someone presents a different perspective, a quiet battle begins within the mind. It is not just an argument over logic; it is an internal conflict between the comfort of familiarity and the discomfort of doubt. The mind resists change, not because it fears being wrong, but because accepting a new truth means dismantling something deeply personal. This psychological resistance is known as cognitive dissonance—the uneasy feeling when new information contradicts an existing belief. And when faced with this discomfort, people react in different ways. Some shut down, ignoring the new perspective altogether. Others argue not to seek clarity but to defend the reality they have always known.

It is a natural reaction, this need to protect one's beliefs. After all, if someone has lived their whole life believing in a certain moral code, a cultural tradition, or a particular worldview, being asked to reconsider it feels like being asked to redefine who they are. The unknown is frightening. It is easier to dismiss a challenge than to deconstruct a long-held belief. And so, conversations that could have led to understanding often end in silence or conflict.

Yet, there is another side to this story. What happens when we are the ones faced with such resistance? When we try to engage in meaningful discussions, only to find ourselves met with denial or hostility? The natural instinct is to push harder, to prove our point, to make the other person see what we see. But in doing so, we unknowingly trigger even more resistance. A battle of egos begins, and the original purpose—to share perspectives, to understand each other—is lost.

The true challenge, then, is not just in recognising the biases in others but in managing our own reactions. Patience becomes the greatest tool in such moments. Finding common ground is the first step, but reaching it is a journey filled with obstacles. A shift in perspective is not something that happens overnight. It is not won through arguments but through thoughtful conversation, through planting small seeds of reflection and allowing them to grow.

Some battles are not meant to be fought head-on. Sometimes, the best approach is not to confront but to listen, to ask rather than to tell, and to create a space where thoughts can evolve naturally. And in the process, we, too, must be willing to examine our own beliefs, to challenge our own biases, and to remain open to the possibility that we, like everyone else, are still learning.

Because in the end, wisdom is not about being right—it is about being willing to grow.